Let them tell you, “No.”

It’s easy to get someone to say “yes” to something like, “Wouldn’t you like to have a million dollars?” Well, they’re probably going to say “yes” to that. What about, “Do you have a moment to talk?” That one is a little tricky -they may not, or they may not want to talk to you even if they had a minute to talk. The problem is not that people don’t want to have a million dollars, or that they don’t have a moment to chat, the problem is motivating someone to do something quickly when you need them to. Verbally, when possible, the best way to get someone to do something is to start out by allowing them to feel more in control by saying “no.” See, “yes” means uncertainty to the mind; there is an uncertainty of what comes after the affirmation. With a “no” answer, nothing comes afterwards, that is, there is no uncertainty -they are waiting for a catch in eaither answer.

So, if I asked someone, “Do you want to lose all your money?,” and they answered “no,” one might have a better chance of being attentive to your next proposal. You could then make a statement like, “Then I’d move your wallet into your from pocket,” and they’d actually listen to you. No command was actually given to them. It was a mere suggestion. Sometimes commands are not needed. Other times they are, but getting someone to comply is much more enjoyable for me when I can have them make the decision themselves than forcing them to act.